Swang Chapel offered a quiet place of mourning and remembrance Saturday night as the Lipscomb community gathered to comfort each other and pray after the sudden passing of freshman Isaac Phillips.
Phillips, a pre-nursing major from Nashville, died late Friday night.
During the gathering, university President Dr. Randy Lowry expressed his sorrow over the loss, saying this is a trying time for the community. He referred to the common belief that college is supposed to be the best four years of your life – a belief emphasized to students during the start of their college experiences.
“And then, all of a sudden, we’re reminded that even in the best four years of your life, sometimes life intervenes; and, together, we walk a somewhat different path,” Lowry said.
He encouraged those in attendance to be a community for the Phillips family during the days ahead.
Lipscomb Academy teacher and head football coach Scott Tillman read a scripture from II Corinthians 1:3-4, which talks about comforting each other in tragic times as we receive comfort from God. Tillman was a coach on the teams that Phillips was a part of during his time at the Academy.
“God is faithful,” Tillman said after the reading.
Senior campus minister Steve Davidson recounted a recent trip to Florida with his family. His young grandson tripped on the sidewalk and received a bump on his forehead. He and his wife hurt for their injured grandson, wanting to be there for him during the pain. Davidson related that experience to what many were feeling in the chapel.
“Scott [Tillman] read a script about the God of all comfort, and that’s why we come together – to comfort each other, to remember Isaac and to pray for his family and those that loved him and those that are close to him, and just to remember him.”
Dr. Jake Morris, chair of the department of psychology and counseling, shared a few thoughts on the grieving process, saying everyone’s level of grief will be different, but that is to be expected.
“We’re all here because we’re hurting on some level,” Morris said. “Some of us knew Isaac very well and loved him and shared his life with him – shared stories, shared laughs, shared heartaches.
“Some of us knew him vicariously through the lives of our children, or through the lives of our girlfriends or boyfriends, and some of us have only come to know Isaac today through the stories that we’ve heard. We’re all here because we love Isaac.
“But, because we knew Isaac in different ways, we react to this event in very different ways. We all grieve in different ways, and the nature of our grief is somewhat related to our relationship that we had with Isaac.
“There’s not a right way or a wrong way that we’re supposed to grieve.”
Morris said some may believe they’re grieving incorrectly, or that they’re going overboard with their grief, but he assures them that, on some level, this is simply a part of the process.
“Some of you might just be heartbreakingly sad right now, and that’s normal, and that’s natural,” Morris said. “Some of you might be so angry right now you don’t know what to do with yourselves.
“Well, that’s normal, and that’s natural.
“So, let me encourage you to cut yourself some slack as you’re trying to figure out what to do with this experience, and how you’re trying to make peace with your mind and with your body, and that’s going to change some over the next days and the next weeks.
“This is not a one-day event. This is not a two-day event. This is something that we’re going to have to process for days and weeks and months to come, and that’s normal, and that’s natural.”
Morris said any pain stemming from the situation should not be kept quiet. He encouraged reaching out to fellow students, RAs and professors.
“As we think about this event on campus, as we think about our pain, let’s not keep that to ourselves,” Morris said.
“Seek out your friends in the dorm and talk to them about it. Share your life with them. As Christian brothers and sisters, that’s what we like to do. Seek out your RAs and talk to them about what’s going on in your life. They want to know. They care about that. Seek out your professors and talk to them.”
Morris said the counseling center on campus is a safe place for students to talk about their grief.
“Don’t keep it inside,” Morris said. “Don’t carry these burdens yourself. Reach out to others as you get a chance.”
He also encouraged students to help their peers who are hurting.
“As we see people who are hurting, let’s reach out to them. If we see people who are acting different than they normally are, then let’s reach out to them.”
Morris said that reaching out to others during difficult times will not make the situation worse.
“We have a need to tell our stories,” Morris said, “to be heard and to be loved as a part of a community.”