Do you feel it yet? Do you feel the lump in the back of your throat, the pounding in your chest, the goosebumps all over your body?
It’s like someone or something is following you, lurking behind the nearest bush. You don’t know how it happened. You don’t know how you got here. But all of a sudden you’re in the middle of the scariest horror movie ever made: finals week.
Welcome to the worst part of the semester. It’s time to begin mourning the loss of decent grades and the downfall of your GPA.
Stage 1: Denial
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You’re a strong, independent college student and you don’t need an exam grade to determine the outcome of your life. If Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs didn’t graduate from college, then you don’t have to either.
Stage 2: Anger
What’s worse than getting hit by a burrito? Your teacher not knowing what’s going to be on the final that you’re taking in 5 days. Or perhaps your teacher giving you a study sheet with information you never covered in class. Did you ever even buy your textbooks? Studying won’t make it better, but canceling the final will. Maybe getting hit with that burrito wasn’t so bad after all.
Stage 3: Bargaining
“Hello, it’s me. I was wondering if I could get a grade above a C?”
It’s never too late to start begging your professors for a higher grade. Extra credit might do the trick. Maybe you can even sway them with a box full of homemade cookies.
Stage 4: Depression
“Is it too late now to say sorry?”
It might be time to start rethinking all of those classes you slept through. Spending your entire class period texting your friends or doing way too much online shopping probably wasn’t the best idea either. Grab the box of tissues and some chocolate — you’ll be okay eventually.
Stage 5: Acceptance
The day before your first final is here and it’s time to accept the fact that laziness and procrastination got the best of you this semester. Find some snacks, dust off your textbook (if you have one) and start studying. You’re going to kill it on your finals and you know it. Regardless of what happened this semester, just remember it’s college and you should have #NoRagrets.