Newly-elected Dean of Intercultural Development, Prentice Ashford, spoke at the Gathering on Tuesday about the past and building future relationships.
The new member of Lipscomb’s family focused on how a person’s past affects their present and the decisions they make. He compared the past to an unwanted Christmas present.
“Our past operates very similar to that Christmas present,” said Ashford. “We either don’t know what to do with it, we don’t know how to handle it, or we awkwardly smile, put it back in the box quickly and ignore it as if it never happened.”
Ashford described the past as either earned or inherited and how those differences can greatly affect the way we interact with others different from us.
“Before today, there are some of us who haven’t stopped long enough to consider how our past influences the way we interact with those around us,” said Ashford. “We just assume that are reality is the reality of everyone around us.”
He shared how when we assume similar realities we miss opportunities to relate to people whose experiences are different to ours because of the walls we build.
That fear towards new people and experiences prevents people from building meaningful relationships with people different from them. In order to get over that fear, Ashford shared his personal philosophy for life and building relationships.
“I can never blame someone for the influences of their past, I can only judge you based on what you do when presented with the reality of the present,” said Ashford.
By not judging others, people can open conversations and grow in understanding of one another and each other’s different experiences.
“I have learned that the present is filled with people who are willing to have conversations on just about anything,” said Ashford. “But the moment that conversation centers towards race, we will do anything we can to downplay it as quickly as possible because it is just so uncomfortable.”
Though the conversation can be difficult, people want to learn and the present continues to grow and evolve. As a send off, Ashford challenged students to create a reality of trust by building relationships with people who have different past influences.
Photo by Anna Rogers